It took me a long time to move forward with this project. Weeks ago I had been planning this in my head. I knew that I wanted to reach out to fellow bloggers and authors and see if they wanted to share their experiences/tips about mental health. The irony of this situation is that my anxiety was so strong that I was scared to reach out to people in the community. I was so worried about what people would do, how they would react and what would happen. I thought about the worse. Welcome to my anxious mind! After 10 weeks of doing my anxiety group, I was feeling so much better and I’m leaning in with my anxiety more. I decided I wanted to go through with this.
I want to share with my readers and followers my new post coming soon on Mondays here on Aphonic Sarah:
I remember being first diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. That day stands out in my mind because it’s the day everything changed. To most people, I’m still the same person I was before this label came around. To me, It’s something brand new and I feel changed. It’ll take a while to remove that label from my mind, but with ongoing help from my therapist, I know it will disappear down the road. I remember when I sought out information on Google about my disorder in hopes of understanding it more. It was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. Information about suicide, cutting and so much more came up. Nothing helpful at all about moving forward and being strong. When I had told my therapist what had happened, she recommended I not search online for information about my disorder just yet. (Yes, it was that bad.)
One in five Canadians will struggle with their mental health in their lifetime. It takes a lot of strength to go to a strange office, sit in front of a strange person and cry. To tell them there is something wrong, there has been for a long time, and now you can’t see through the shadows of your mind. It takes a lot of vigor to battle through those demons. I felt like I have no one to relate to when it came to my diagnosis. My BPD was a fresh open wound and the internet was just driving salt into the wounds, reminding me of the things I encounter or fight on a daily basis.
Mental Health Monday is a weekly guest post from authors and bloggers in the community who want to share their battle or experiences with mental health. None of us are health care professionals or experts in this field. (Unless I do manage to get a professional on the blog, which I’m working on.) These are just normal, everyday people who have had a mental health challenge them in their everyday lives. They will be people who have watched what mental health has done to those around them, their loved ones, and how they wish they would have handled things differently. Mental health affects not only the person but the loved ones around them.
I’ve always spoken about my BPD, anxiety and depression openly on my blog and Twitter. It’s something I’m not afraid to speak out about. I want my blog to be a place where someone with the strife of mental health can come across. Somewhere a person could find a post and think, ‘Hey. I feel like this and someone else does too.’ My hope is that this person will feel a little less lonely in the world. I hope that maybe they get some ideas on how to make it through things a bit easier. My hope is that they will feel like a human and not like their diagnosis. Maybe that person will even find a bit of fight inside them to step into that stranger’s office and pursue the help they need.
I have some amazing authors and bloggers lined up. Including a special post from S. Usher Evans on May 12th, which will be a Thursday and not Monday. The following Monday I will be starting up posts and hopefully, I can get enough people to keep this project moving!
If you know anyone who would be interested in writing a post for this project, please send them my way! You can find me on Twitter @Aphonicsarah OR you can toss me an email! (firstname.lastname@example.org) You do NOT need to be an author or book blogger to participate. If you have a story you would like to share, please feel free to reach out. Everyone is welcome to share their journey and opinions with us. If you want to write something, please send me a DM or email.
If you feel you could help out with this, please feel free to reach out. Everyone is welcome to share their journey and opinions with us. There is no pressure to get overly personal about your life or experiences. If there is something you don’t want to share – Don’t. Some of us have struggles we wish to keep close to our heart until we’re ready, or forever.
Thank you so much, everyone. I’m excited about this project. It’s you guys who are making this possible and I just want to send you all a big virtual hug. <3